Do you interrupt your spouse?

This is a cute rendition of a spouse interrupting the other while discussing how they met and fell in love.

But…interrupting your spouse can get you in some hot water and even develop bad habits.  We recently went to a marriage conference that showed this video and when we thought hard about it, we realized that we interrupt each other occasionally – especially during conflicts.

We have seen some couples who have developed habits of interrupting the other when just talking casually about stories in the past or present.  The wife may be explaining a story and the husbands stops her and says something like “well it didn’t really happen like that, it actually was this.”

This is just another time when a spouse needs to dig deep inside for patience and let go of the need to be right.  And we aren’t suggesting it’s easy!

But, the next time you have the urge to interrupt your spouse to correct a story – try letting it go.  If it helps you to say to yourself: “he isn’t right here and I could interrupt him, but i’m going to respect him and just let it go.”

Most importantly – and obviously the hardest time – to listen and not interrupt is during a disagreement.  It is these times that we desperately want our spouse to hear what we are saying and to react with patience and in a loving way.  But let’s face it – we know that our instinct is to interrupt, snap back and blame the other spouse.  This has been a big struggle for us and we know this is a critical area in which we need to get better.

If this is a serious problem that neither of you have addressed before, then find a quiet time to sit down, and with a soft heart, explain to your spouse that interrupting is a problem and you want to point it out in hopes that they will stop because you feel disrespected.  Many times – probably most times – spouses don’t know they are doing it – like is the case with us.

Of course, there are those spouses that interrupt the other to finish a sentence they know the answer to – and that’s probably because they know each other so well – or they have ESP.  That can be a good, cute, loving (and possibly scary) time to interrupt.  That is when couples usually have been together for a long time – or just know each other deeply.  And it is fun to watch!

“We adore more than we irritate, that’s why we’ve lasted so long.” – Cathy Thorne

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